#MarriageGoals2020 Now ere’body want an entanglement

MARRIAGE: The legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners in a personal relationship (https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/marriage)

Naturally, we evolve; rather it's good or bad. In a marriage, both parties may outgrow one another. The tricky part is making sense of the changes within one another. Is love enough to carry you through when the going gets really rough? Do you make it work because you feel obligated, or do you face facts and go your separate ways if you're both no longer equally yoked. People like to bring up the fact that many of their grandparents and great grandparents stayed married for 50+ years. That sounds all good and dandy, but some of these marriages have deep dark secrets. Some of these marriages are only standing on the facades of looking like holy matriarchs and patriarchs. It was very frowned upon for women to leave their men. They had no control. It wasn't however, frowned upon for the men to go out, have affairs, and secret babies. Marriage is overly glorified due to the expansiveness of big fancy weddings and social media influence in recent years.

Many people are scared of marriage because of the ultimate commitment factor. It's not so easy to break away when you have legal ties. I respect people that have a long term relationship or engagement. Sometimes if it ain't broke down fix it. The infamous relationship people love to make relationship memes about - Jim Jones and Chrissy Lampkin. There was a recent interview where she states how her views about wanting to get married changed. The dynamic of the relationship at this point is perfect for both of them. They've been riding out this long NOT being married. Sure there are benefits to being married but its not end all be all.

Some time ago, The Shaderoom reposted someone's tweet about the idea of having an option to renew your marriage license within a specified time frame like a state license. When that period is up, you and your spouse decide to stay together or part ways. I'm totally for it! Divorce can be a long and drawn-out process. I feel that would allow for a little simplicity in this modern age. I know you probably rolled your eyes hard, but hey, I'm just saying. While the thought of staying with someone forever is romantic, it's not always realistic. I applaud people who've decided to remarry, especially if they've done it multiple times. I believe a person has many soulmates. It may depend on where you're at mentally, spiritually, and emotionally, determining who you will attract at any given time.

Jada Pinkett-Smith is currently under the bright excruciating limelight due to a shocking revelation made by August Alsina. He told the world via an interview with Angela Yee that he and Jada had a relationship while still being married to Will Smith. I'm pretty sure everyone has tuned in to the latest episode of The Red Table Talk. Jada came clean about her" entanglement" with Alsina. Although it's nice that she cleared the air, we already knew August was right. If you look at all the pictures with them together, the body language says it all. She said she wanted to feel good since she was unhappy for quite some time. She and Will both cleared up that they were separated at that point in which that relationship transpired. Now obviously, them having relations while she's still technically married is unconventional in the public's eye. I'm sure Will had him a little something on the side, please believe that. Twenty-five years is a long time to be with the same person.

Love is complicated - everyone has their own version and interpretation for what it means to them. There's no one love fits all. Invariably the goal is to end up with someone that comes close to your love language. Obviously, I'm not married, so I can't speak thoroughly on the subject; however, It's been drilled in my head by married couples that marriage takes work.

This is why we shouldn't covet other people's relationships. Putting people on a pedestal causes unrealistic expectations that many will never meet. Normalize not wanting a Will Smith or a Russel Wilson and want a man meant for you. I realize this may come off as me bashing marriage, but I'm not. Sometimes in my moments of being a "realist," my focus on the cons can be a bit much. I honestly hope one day, a man asks me to be his wife. That would be a great honor. I would hope that if my husband decides he doesn't love me any more or I start feeling different about him, we'd have that open communication to talk about our next moves and be amicable. I respect Will and Jada for deciding to stay married after that rough period they experienced. It's obvious the love is there. May we all be lucky enough to have someone who will genuinely love us through all trials and tribulations.